Frat Boy Go Home
by The Judge, Archbishop of Atonement
I hate frat
not talking about individuals who join fraternities ÷ I'm sure that the
tradition of fraternal orders offers some unforeseen benefit to college
students. Rather, I'm talking about the stereotypical frat boy. The guys with
their baseball cap on backwards, drinking beer after beer after beer, who come
to Burning Man thinking it's just like spring break at Daytona Beach. Well this
isn't Daytona Beach any more than it's Woodstock. This is Black Rock City and
we don't cater to those types of individuals 'round these parts.
places like Daytona Beach, Florida and Lake Havasu, Arizona are besieged by
sex-crazed college students in their fervent effort to forget all things
scholastic and concentrate on getting drunk and laid.
about the only similarity between the spring break areas and Black Rock City.
Everyone wants to get laid and escape reality for a little while, but out here
on the playa, things are a little different. Out here, a big part of what makes
this city (and event) so damn cool is the fact that it is not what most people
expect. You ask anyone that has never been out here and I will bet they think
of it being this big rave out in the middle of nowhere. I bet you even thought
that as well, didn't you? But once you're out here, you see that it is so much
more and so completely different from the normal large events that take place.
So for all
you new people that haven't had it pounded into your skulls as you drove
through the gate, let me remind you of some key things to keep in your head:
This is not a place to forget the simple aspect of drinking
more water than alcohol. But if you haven't had this edict ingrained into your
cranium by this time, then you are probably not worth saving anyway. Go ahead,
have another brew. Beer's mostly water, right?
This is not a rave in the sense that you can't just toss
your empty water bottle on the ground and expect it to get picked up after the
event by a bunch of cleanup crews. Mom ain't here. Pick up your goddamned
This is not the place to be walking around without
sunscreen, video camera around your neck shouting, "Show me your
tits" to every female that walks by.
This is not a place where you want to get sick. Period. Sure
the first aid people are top notch, but you should make it your goal to never
see them. Never need them. Take responsibility for your own little life and do
what you can to stay healthy.
This is not just a
rave. Sure one only needs to open their ears at night to hear the incessant
"thump thump thump" of sound systems spinning
techno-electro-trance-dance music in just about every direction, and if you are
into the whole "rave" thing I am sure you can get your fill ÷ but
there is so much more to this place. Get out of the rave tents and camps and
check out some of the other stuff the city has to offer.
this is an area that promotes free thinking and free expression in just about
every conceivable form, but at the same time, this is not the place to be an
irresponsible bonehead. It's important to take responsibility for your actions.
The rule around here has always been "do whatever you want, so long as it
doesn't infringe upon the rights of others" and that means if you walk
around, looking at the entire event through a camera, swilling brewskies and
tossing your garbage on the ground, you are infringing on my rights to have a
good time here as well.
And I really don't like having my rights