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Fashion is burning
by Sister Kitty Catalyst, Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence

While I hardly profess being a fashion guru, my styling voodoo may work for you too. Besides, if you're reading this, you probably need all the help you can get.

So here you are, in the dusty, blight, and bitter Black Rock Desert--filled with drab and neutral colors such as beige and tan. Why not add some sparkle and pizzazz to this rather somber palette? By all means, wear bright colors! You need to retain some white highlights however, to spark the contrast of colors in your ensemble.

Flowing, fluffy fabrics are highly recommended. Really, any fabric that's light and airy should work. Layer them a la sheik--no, not the condom--for maximum effect. Consider ripping scraps into strips for additional accenting. If nothing else, at least wrap a towel around your head, allowing you to dry it--and build a turban--at the same time. Resourcefulness is the key here!

Wearing a toga or covering oneself with mud have both become so popular on the playa, they're practically clichˇ. Let's face it--they've been done to death. Still, if you must resort to one of these tired-but-true fashion trends, definitely add your own little twists to set yourself apart.

With mud, try patterns or stripes. Hell, pile it on and make your own shoulder pads or breast implants. And don't forget to accentuate the lower legs, as you'll want spectators to get the full-length treatment. Mix in some beet juice or any other colorfast food to make colorful, wearable, facial masks. Or draw in designs or patterns with a burnt wine cork, which makes black accents on and around dried mud easy and workable.

The key to wearing a toga with style is all in the accessories. Try a colorful sash and pearl-drop earrings. If you forgot to pack laurel leaves, then improvise! Try charcoal or burned wood--stunning and convenient. A big necklace is always a plus. Find anything and put it on a string. Or carry around a scepter or torch, both of which work well for accessorizing a outfit.

Embarrassed by that boring parasol or umbrella? Find some spray paint or get some watered-down mud. Make some patterns or do splotching. I'm known for hanging wine corks a la dingo-style from mine--my parasol that is--and touching it up with doo-dads or strips of fabric. There's plenty of room out here, so fill it up a bit--if you're serving as a sun shield, you're bound to make friends quickly.

Tin foil, wax paper, napkins, garbage, plastic, used car parts--all of these can be used as accents for your outfit. Everything is fair game in the wild range. Choose or lose--it's your choice, but accessorizing is the key. If all else fails, find a partner or two, and dress alike. Even if you do a less than favorable job, you'll still pass, as people will simply think that they've missed the point. Above all though, have fun--and be sure to look good doing it!

Good luck and Goddess bless.

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