Random survival tips
Apply the sunscreen before the morning caffeine.
'I know Larry' does not work as a pick-up line.
Lower your hair care standards.
Primal screaming out at the garbage fence is a great way to reduce stress. Plus, you can look for your shit that blew away.
Whatever you stick up your nose or any other orifice, if you make yourself a burden to others by passing out, freaking out, or losing it, you are an amateur who has no business being here. Maybe your mother will still love you. We won't. So take it easy!
- complied by Penfold, Caution Mike, and
Rev. Blind Toaster